In a recent Woman's Hour programme on first date etiquette, spaghetti, oysters and lobster were just some of the foods described as deal breakers. Men were suspicious of women who ordered salad ("heavy interaction might take place with the fridge later on") or displayed overt greed ("if she flies at the food, she might fly at other things"). Women disliked men who were rude to waiters, or showed no aptitude for the art of conversation.

Yet the Radio 4 programme made no reference to the thousands of people for whom dates are like needles in haystacks. If you can't remember when someone last asked you out, it isn't the minefield of how to behave in a restaurant that causes anguish, it's securing a date in the first place